Afriend of mine once sent me the note below. I often return to it when I am in the dumps. It is such a beautiful story I thought I might share it with you all.
Dear Cyprian,
My family and I thought that your email was so sincere and
beautifully written. You summed up all that he (John Mascarenhas) represented so well. Many thanks
for your kind words and sentiments from us all.
As you can imagine, having gone through losing your beloved Rufi, I am still in
a daze after all that has happened and I just can’t get motivated into doing
anything. I feel so empty and miss him so much, especially with Christmas round
the corner. Things you take for granted all come to mind now, like there is no
one to greet you at the door or share a cup of tea when you get home. There is
no one to tell you how nice you look or take care of or cook for.
I miss his warm and tender love, hugs and kisses, his smell, his lovely smile
and our little chats at night. I smile sometimes and cry sometimes, mainly
tears of joy when I remember all the little things he used to say and do that
used to brighten up my day. The songs that we used to love bring back memories
and an ache in my heart at the same time. Thank God, we Christians have a hope
in Jesus and His Promises so we will all meet again eternally someday. I look
forward to that day.
I was indeed privileged and honoured to have had him for my husband, to walk
proudly by his side and hold his hand (quite possessively, I might add). My
parents loved him and always used to tell me what a nice tall handsome man he
was. He boarded with my family in Kampala when he attended Secondary School and
was practically raised by my mum. After that, he went to Cardiff, Wales and I
went to the Royal College of Nairobi only to find ourselves teaching round the
corner from each other on our return home and it was meant to be - our destiny.
I felt really proud to be his wife and I always used to let him know that he
was my gift from God as I prayed so hard for him and wanted him with all my
heart and soul and when all else was against us, God chose to give him to me.
We had such a happy and beautiful life together (after going through hell and
high waters with his family). Yes, St Jude, he would tease me. Through all the
tragedies and difficulties we faced, we managed to get through together always
with God’s help, that I never cease to praise and thank God for the life I have
shared with this beautiful gentle loving man who I deeply loved and cherished
all my life.
I am so blessed to have had his children who are a source of comfort and great
help to me with snippets of their father coming through in each one of them and
our grandchildren. I used to ask him why he didn’t pick someone pretty and tall
like him and he would say, ‘Don’t you know good things come in small packages?
Besides, I always wanted you, too’.
He would remind me of the times he would throw pebbles at me on our way to
school (to get my attention he said) and I thought he hated me and how he would
purposely kick me under the dinner table with his long legs or accidently touch
my fingers whilst playing Carom - little things that meant a lot to us when we
were growing up in an era when talking to boys was taboo. Secretly, I was glad
he didn’t have a good taste for women as he could have had anyone he wanted but
he chose me – all thanks to St Jude.
What a funny kind of a day! Sorry, I got a bit carried away with my thoughts
but it has helped to ease the ache in my heart that I have had all afternoon.
The passing away of another close friend threw me in the dumps again. I hope
you’ll understand and won’t mind my foolishness.
I'll carry his heart in my heart always and I know his spirit will always be
around us.
I hope you are doing OK and thanks once again for your lovely email. It was
nice for the children to know what others thought of their father.
All the best and God Bless. Ivy.
She passed away not so long ago. Her children and grandchildren gave her a rousing send off. I am sure she was smiling!
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